Category Archives: Doug Reinhardt

Paris Hilton is single again. God help us all!

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What Paris Hilton wants, Paris Hilton gets. And what Paris Hilton doesn’t want, her publicist gets rid of for her. Yup, that seems to be the slutty heiress’s motto when it comes to dumping the men in her life. It’s confirmed that Paris has split-up with boyfriend/lapdog, The Hills “actor” Doug Reinhardt and she asked her publicist to do the dumping for her. Apparently Paris doesn’t like confrontations. A spokesperson from Paris’ camp told People.com, “In response to the enquiry on whether Paris Hilton has split up with Doug Reinhardt, yes, this is true they are no longer together. They remain friends and ask that you please respect their privacy.” So when reporters approached Doug for a comment, he idiotically said “No, that’s not true. Everything is OK between us.” I guess he doesn’t read the news. Yup, to read in the news, along with everyone else, that your relationship is over, well that’s gotta be a new low point for Paris. Just when I was starting to like her… okay that’s a lie. I never liked her.

The break-up comes as a surprise to many (including, I’m sure, to Doug himself) since for months and months while they were dating, Paris constantly barked about Doug as being the one. Talk of having kids was even thrown around. But alas, like I’ve said a million times – nothing is forever in Hollywood. No one seemed more surprised about the break-up than Doug’s co-star and one-time flame Lauren Conrad who had nothing but good things to say about Doug’s easy-going demeanor, even though that may have been the cause of the break-up. She further gushes “Doug’s pretty awesome. We dated my senior year of high school – he moved back and then it was like, ‘Oh, we’ll pick up where we left off’”. She also says that Doug is never in charge of a relationship and just likes to “have fun. That’s all that matters.”

It’s still pretty unclear what the real cause of Paris and Doug’s break-up is, but Paris is wasting no time. Yup, she’s already been seen following around futballer of the moment Christian Ronaldo, even spending a few nights together. But if you believe the incessant rumors about Christian, he probably just wants to spend the night in her shoe closet. But if it is indeed true that the two are seeing each other, that must be such a blow to Doug. I mean, come on, let the sheets cool down a bit before you invite someone new in. But then again, once a ho, always a ho. And it’s pretty hard to get back at Paris. Release nude pictures? Happened. Leak a sex video? Old news. Send her to prison? Hello!? Paris has got absolutely nothing to lose, ergo she can fuck anyone, and fuck with anyone as well. Lifestyles of the Rich and Bitchy. See more of this type of Hollywood bad behavior right here.

Paris Hilton would make an awful stripper

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What would you do if you were at a swanky soiree, you sitting on an expensive white fur sofa sipping expensive champagne and nibbling on delectable hors d’œuvres chatting with learned guests about the works of Heidegger and the latest Buñuel exhibit at the Guggenheim while the soft gentle strains of Chet Baker fill the room, and you turn and see a skinny, skanky-looking woman with her legs up in the air straddling some guy who is basically groping her ass to keep her from falling on it. You’d be shocked, right? Now, imagine you discover the woman is walking biohazard Paris Hilton and the man is her boy-of-the-moment human peen-head Doug Reinhardt. You probably wouldn’t be so shocked. Not because she’s a “celebrity”, but because you wouldn’t expect anything less from the tabloid and blogsphere denizen.

Yes, once again the skank and the dick caused quite a stir when they went out a few nights ago and I guess since it was a pretty high-end event and smart, eloquent people were populating the party making things pretty boring for the two idiots, they got bored. So bored in fact that Paris decided to perform an impromptu lapdance for Doug, and I guess all the other people at the party. Thinking that she’s the hottest shit since Cheez Whiz she went ahead and did the full on legs in the air, gyrations, and faux-stripping. Classy. And being the lapdog that he is, Doug was more than eager to take the show in.

See, this is exactly why Paris gets thrown out of every event she attends. Just a few days ago, she was reported to have been thrown off a yacht owned by Elton John’s lover David Furnish because of tonsil hockey in front of disgusted guests. Some time back, she was banned entry into a club because of her previous hard partying. And even before that, she was asked to leave a swanky party because the host did not care for her shenanigans. Why does she even bother to leave the house in the first place? Does she actually believe in the adage “bad publicity is good publicity”? In Paris’ case, it clearly isn’t. She should’ve gotten her fill of bad press by now. But for a fame-hungry whore like her, there’s no such thing as “enough”. See more of that bad behavior from Paris and more of your favorite stars right here.

Paris Hilton VS Doug Reinhardt VS The LAPD

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Paris Hilton hasn’t exactly had the best track record in relationships, or with the popo. Take for instance something that happened recently that combined the two Paris Problems into one. Apparently, Paris’ neighbors heard screaming from her house, screams that could be heard from way down the street. It sounded like Paris and her current flame Doug Reinhardt were having a very heated argument, and thinking that the neighbors were witnessing a Rihanna-Chris Brown redux decided to call the police so they could investigate. When they arrived, no one would open the gates so they had to jump the fence and make their way to the door, only to be greeted by an upset Paris and a frightened Doug (okay, so I made that last part up). Turns out, Paris had received a phone call saying that her beloved chihuahua Tinkerbell had been run over and killed, which lead to the screaming, which led to Doug screaming, which led to the neighbor’s phone call to the police, which led to here. Turned out that it was just a prank call and that Tinkerbell was really safe and sound.

Now, why would anyone wanna play a prank on Paris? She’s the sweetest, kindest, most well behaved heiress on the planet right now. So what if she goes on vacation for weeks on end and keeps her pets locked up in a closet to starve to death? So what if she can’t keep her mouth away from every 8-inch cock that makes it’s way into her mouth? So what if she regularly videotapes her sexual calisthenics and “accidentally” leaks them on the net? This is one of the most talented and beloved national treasures America has ever produced. She’s right along the lines of adored and respected individuals like George W. Bush, Anita Bryant, and Shauna Sand. She’s an amazing person and should be treated as such.

What I’m really worried about is Tinkerbell. If Paris freaks out every time the dogs goes outside for a dump away from her eyeline for about five minutes, then what chance does it have from ever escaping her evil clutches? Poor dog can’t even fake it’s own death to start a new life in sunny Mexico and re-join her chihuahua brethren. After all, any place away from the fortress of doom is better. I just have this image of Tinkerbell, doing her best human voice, dialing Paris and telling her it’s been killed, it’s Gucci and LVs packed and ready beside her. But trust Paris to freak out and ruin any chance of escape. After being witness to the horrible conditions Paris puts her pets through, Tinkerbell must have though it’s be Scot-free. Just goes to show that the only way to escape Paris is death.

See more Hollywood fuckery right here.

Paris Hilton continues to be classy

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Whenever Paris Hilton hits the town, you know something terrible is gonna happen. America’s favorite skank went out with boyfriend Doug Reinhardt and on the way home decided to give the paps something to snap. Yes, you guessed it – she flashed her panties.

Walking down the stairs of restaurant My House, Paris thought it the perfect opportunity for some panty flashing. Spotting the photogs at the foot of the stairs probably made her think “Great, paparazzi! Too bad I’m wearing panties tonight. Oh, well, gotta stay in the headline…” and bam, there we have it.

And if that wasn’t enough, in the car drive home, Paris and Doug decided to do a little tongue hockey for all to see. She must’ve thought she had to do something to make for her wearing panties. So a little tongue action for the photogs oughtta do it. I wonder if she talked to Doug about it before hand – the exact amount of tongue to show, angles for the most effective view, the wideness of the mouth – that sort of stuff. I’m fairly certain that Paris thinks about this stuff and plans this in advance. Any mediawhore worth her salt would do the exact thing.

So it never fails to amaze me when stuff like this happens to Paris. Not because I’m shocked when it does, but rather that it gets reported everytime. Here is a woman who practically has the entire media blogsphere in the palm of her hands, and we play right into them. That’s it. This is the last Paris Hilton blog entry I will ever write. That is… until she does some other thing that’ll make me go OMG! Just like the stuff you’ll find over here — celebs at their most OMG.