Why oh why would anyone, ANYONE, go out of the house looking like this? It doesn’t seem to be a problem for 90210 slut AnnaLynne McCord. I mean, come on…

Looking like she spent the whole day two feet away from the sun, then attempted to hide it with terrible foundation and even worse concealer, AnnaLynne is a walking disaster. Fug doesn’t even begin to describe this chick’s appearance. It doesn’t help that she’s practically skin and bones and has a smile that goes all the way behind her ears. It’s like one of those shrunken heads before they become shrunk.

I for one will not stand for this sort of attention-whoring. AnnaLynne, just go back to your tried and true look-at-me-tactic: the nipple slip. You’re practically the master at that, having done it, what, three times. And 90210 has only been around less than a year! It’s obvious that you’re terrified of being out of the spotlight. But trust me, this is not the way to go. What’s next? The zany outfits? The crazy family members who come floating out of the woodwork? Nonsensical behavior? A movie with Pauly Shore?

My advice, stick with the nipple slips. Then maybe move up to the pussy flash. Shaved first, then unshaven. Then do the full spread-legged. Then when that pans out, time to bring out the big guns: the fuck vid. That’ll go a long way. Way more than coming out in clown make-up after being crisped like bacon. And definitely much more jizz-inducing. Kinda like the stuff over here. Celebs, models, actresses, and all-around hotness.